spoken poetry: you are stuck with me

here’s a spoken poetry video of “you are stuck with me”


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Spoken poetry: what is my proof that God exists?

Here’s a spoken word version of my poem “what is my proof that God exists?”.  Trying to do open mics around town and practicing speaking my poems on video :).



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face in the clouds

“I knew his face.
It was the face in the clouds,
the rainbow and sun rays in the sky,
the whisper in the wind,
the song in my ears.
That is who was before me”

(from “you are stuck with me” by me)


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Poem: what is my proof that God exists?

What is my proof?
My proof that God exists?
Allow me a moment
to think about this
Perhaps the mountains?
Oh Heavens no!
That is not good enough
Though they tower above us all,
in beauty and majesty
There are natural forces on earth,
that could wipe them out in a moment
Perhaps the stars?
Oh that could never be my proof!
Though these giants of light and power,
far surpass even the sun itself
The sight I see with my own eyes,
could be but a mere remnant of it
Because even the stars,
don’t last forever
What is my proof that God exists?
I have my proof!
My proof that God exists is the most
beautiful of all creation
My proof that God exists is amazing and resilient
Having gone through many trials of fire and pain
They still stand
My proof that God exists is creative and talented
creating masterpieces no other living thing on earth
could ever dream of making!
My proof that God exists loves with an incredible love
and gives with an incredible heart
that is all by CHOICE
because their gift of choice is unique as well
What is my proof that God exists?
My proof that God exists….
is YOU
God’s masterpiece that he loves so much
that he sent his son to die for
the creation that is the only thing he wants
from this earth when it is gone
God’s brilliant child made from a love
we can’t even imagine
my proof is YOU
I see no nothing else before me
that proves God exists more than YOU

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Me and My Thorn

Depression and anxiety are not my identity. I only have one identity, and that is that I am a child of God. That is the only identity that will cross into eternity and endure. Nothing else will remain when this life ends.
It feels like one because of how close it is with me though. Its like a thorn in my side that has grown vines and even more thorns that dig into me. It is something I feel God has chosen not to remove from me in this life I don’t even ask him to anymore because he’s not going to.
It is a separate entity that is so close it appears as an identity, but it is not me. But here we are, stuck together for the remaining time we are here. So I will use it to fuel my work since I am stuck with it. It is tied into all of my writing, art and outreach so much that I don’t know if any of my work I have poured out would exist without this thorn.
Its gotten to the point that I don’t even feel right wishing this thorn away knowing what I do now. Its just there, I don’t like it, but I’ll just try to work with it as best as I can. It’ll be gone forever one day anyway.
So, this thorn is separate from me and close with me, but it is not me. We work closely together against its will for the good of others, but only one of us will enter into eternity one day.

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Will you have faith and stay with us?

God has chosen a time for your life to end. It could be soon. It could be far away from now. There is a point in time already marked for that. So if you grow weary of the darkness and hurt of this world, there is a point where that will end if you cling to the promises found in Jesus. So you don’t have to fear this pain never ending….because IT WILL.
But…can you trust in the point God has picked for your life to end? Can you have faith that the time he has picked is right…or will you take it into your own hands?
Because if its not this day…if that time is not today for you to depart this world…it means you still have a mission here…a task that needs to be completed….because only you can do this task.
It also means that God will be with you every step of the way as you continue here through this what seems like at times a never ending cycle of depression and anxiety and despair.
It also means that God knows you can get through all of this with him beside you every step of the way.
So, will you take that step of faith and continue with us today? Will you take the plunge of confidence that God has already chosen the right time for you to depart this world?
Will you stay with us today? Stay with all of us here whom God has said today is another day for us to remain here.

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This is not for my personal glory

One thing that drives me nuts when I do something like post a new piece for my column….is this little voice from Satan that tries to convince me I should be getting more attention on myself or something. He always comes in picking around like

“hey shouldn’t they give you more attention for this? Hey that person got attention what about you? Look over here its like no one noticed what you did!”

…and I have to scream pretty much I DON’T DO ANY OF THIS STUFF FOR PERSONAL ATTENTION ON MYSELF!!! Over and over every time he chimes in trying to convince me I should be mad and filled with pride I have to keep saying I don’t do this for personal attention or personal glory, and I WOULD DO THIS EVEN IF NO ONE KNEW ABOUT IT.

I have said it to many people and i mean it….if I went through all these years of depression, addiction, and anxiety just to be here at this moment to be able to message ONE PERSON all I have learned from these years…that ONE PERSON is worth it. God thinks that one person is worth it to do all that work on earth for…to move many people around on this earth just to be in the right place help one person….one person is worth it, and I agree with him.

Besides I’m an introvert, why would I want a bunch of attention on myself? lol

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